Understanding Choice

Apply your learning from your Levels of Truth exercise to begin to see your part in the situation and how your values are connected to your scenario by exploring the concept of taking 100% responsibility for your situation.

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Workbook Pages 38 - 40

Understanding Choice | Workbook Page 38

Choice and Personal Responsibility | Workbook Page 40

Alright. Now that we've explored two of the three pillars of self responsibility, that to me all encompass the second step to my three step process about exploring the mindset that's required to achieve your domino goal. I'm going to play with you a little bit cause we're going to explore the concept of choice and taking a hundred percent responsibility.
So in your workbook, you'll notice the word I. Actually, it's just the letter I, and what I want you to write beside that letter is the word can't, and for the next 60 seconds, I want you to write down all the things that you can't do. For example, I can't skydive. I can't speak Spanish. I can't answer all my emails.
I can't get out of bed in time to go to the gym. So take the next 60 seconds and just write all the things that you can't do.
Okay. Now that you've written down all the things that you can't do, you'll notice there's another letter I on the page. What I want you to write beside that when it is, I won't, and all those things that you said you can't do. I want you to change and write the sentence. I won't, I won't skydive. I won't learn how to speak Spanish.
I won't answer all my emails and I won't get out of bed in time for the gym. So take your time. Translate all those icons into icons.
Okay. Now that you've done that, do you notice a difference? Most people notice that it can be quite confronting and also empowering on a deeper level. Rather than saying that you can't do something saying you can't do something, gives all your power out there, but saying that I won't. You're owning, you're claiming your power, you're making a conscious decision, and on some level that's quite freeing.
Letting go of this theory that you can't do something and rather just owning that you won't. Maybe not now, maybe not yet. Maybe not ever. So this is an introduction to the third pillar of self understanding, and that's called taking 100% responsibility for your life. Now, how much do you believe you choose everything in your life?
Think about it. On a scale of one to ten one being you choose nothing, 10 being you choose everything. Some people believe everything is predetermined and other people believe you choose your life, your death, your birth, your parents. Where do you fall on that scale of one to 10 now, most of the people that I work with score around a seven, eight, sometimes a nine.
Most people say, you know what? I don't choose everything in my life, but I can choose how I respond to the things in my life. So just entertain this definition of choice. I choose my own life and I always have, I choose my behavior, my feelings, my thoughts, my illness, my body, my reactions, and my spontaneity would, if that were true, what would change?
What if you took 100% responsibility for your life? Years ago, I learned this fundamental formula for living from my friend Jack Canfield, and it's E plus R equals O. Event plus response equals outcome. All the outcomes you're experiencing in your life is because you responded to events in a particular way.
Many people want to blame the event on the outcome. For example, I shot my worst golf game on a windy day. The event is the wind, but that doesn't explain. The person who shot their best golf came on that very same windy day. It's really how we respond to the events in our life that create our outcomes.
And if you're willing to take a hundred percent responsibility for your life, you'll notice that your point of power lies between the E and the R between the neutral event. The event has no meaning. You give it meaning and you respond to it. That space between the EMDR is your personal power where you can decide.
How you want to respond to the things that are happening outside of you to create more of the outcomes that you desire. And here's the key to understanding and to ground yourself in your responses. It's about understanding your values. If you're clear on your values, you can take clear kind and fearless action forward.
Your reactions are grounded in your values, so therefore you can create more of the outcomes you desire. But if you decide to embrace a hundred percent responsibility for your life, you have to give up things like blaming and complaining and justifying and defending and um, excuse making. You got to give all that up.
If you're going to take a hundred percent responsibility for your life, that's a lot. But now what I want you to do is test the theory. What if you were a hundred percent responsibility. Responsible. What if you were a hundred percent responsible for your life? What I want you to do is think back to that scenario that you used in your, your levels of truth, exercise and see if you can even more clearly find your part in it.
And in your workbook, that's an exercise that's called choice and personal responsibility. So thinking of that situation, I want you to answer these questions. Does a level five that you came to ring true for you? Does that resonate? Does that make sense? And what do you do to contribute to that situation?
And what are your payoffs for creating that situation? There's a payoff in everything, right? Some paths are positive and some are negative, but we get something out of what we do, right? So you got to look for the payoff, and then what is the cost. Of creating that situation. If you were a hundred percent responsible for that situation, what was your part and what is the cost?
What is it costing you for creating that? And then what I want you to do is, this is where we're starting to tap into the alignment piece. I want you to reflect on your top five values and choose the values. If any of your values are being compromised or bumped up against in that scenario, and that's where you're able to understand the source.
Oh, the frustration or the fear. And given that insight, I want you to reflect what have you learned? Um, if you were to take a hundred percent responsibility for that situation, then what could you do to improve the situation? So take your time, unpack that scenario that you used in your levels of truth, exercise, and see if you can take just a little bit deeper.
Look. From the perspective of taking a hundred percent responsibility for what your part was in that situation. All right, we'll see you on the other side of that exercise. .